Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
