Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
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