Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
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