he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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