It's Friday. Sex?
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Randomize
