i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize