You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
