sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
