Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
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