Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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