So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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