I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Randomize