Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
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