You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
People with herpes should wear stickers.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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