Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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