You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
