In the future we'll all be gay
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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