Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
