White coat. Heels.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Randomize