I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
its liver damage thursday
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
