weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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