I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
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