i don't like sucking hair
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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