wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
