I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize