This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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