I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
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