Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
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she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
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Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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