It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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