at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
