When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
