so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Randomize