would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
