She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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