Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
