there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
