is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
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