Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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