Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Randomize
