We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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