You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize