She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
