But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize
