i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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