Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Randomize