I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
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