I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
