Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
