do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
That's how pantless uber rides happen
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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