East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
