so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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