oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
