I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
