I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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